I see you
by Ninnia
Summary: Ja'far was supposed to be in control of himself, and yet, when it came to Sinbad he lost it all. Why did it hurt to see others with him? To have what he could not.


Ja'far stood in the shadows of the great hall, watching Sinbad move across the floor entertaining his guests. His eyes never left his King even when at times it hurt to watch. His chest felt tight as another beautiful woman attached herself to His side. It squeezed when he watched Sinbad's attention move to her and his hand brushed across her back. It grew hard to breathe when she moved to whisper in his ear. But still he watched. Unable to tear his eyes away from the man. The man who changed everything; who ruined everything; who showed Ja'far something so perfect, knowing it would never be.

Ja'far tensed when he felt a hand on his arm. He glanced up, his muscles tense, ready to defend if necessary. He relaxed when he saw it was Masrur. To those who didn't know him, Masrur's face looked blank, but after years of being with the other, Ja'far had learnt to read him well and to him the concern in Masrur's eyes was clear as day. Ja'far forced a soft smile for the other and shrugged the hand off.

"Can I help you Masrur?"

Just as Ja'far could read Masrur's mask, the Finalist could read his. Ja'far looked away, not wanting to see the look in the other's eyes, only to let his own land on Sinbad once more… the same woman sat with him.

"Go." Ja'far didn't move when Masrur spoke.

"He is our King. As his advisor and one of his Generals I must stay by his side."

"Not now. Go rest, the others and I are enough for now."

Ja'far watched Sinbad for a while, the tight feeling from earlier returning, before he tore his eyes away. Masrur was right. He needed to get out. With a nod to Masrur he silently left the hall in the shadows not noticing the pair of eyes that followed him.

The rest of the palace was quiet as Ja'far made his way through the grand corridors. Even after all these years he still felt out of place in them. Ja'far scowled and hurried on, wanting to be in his room as soon as possible. A few servants greeted him but Ja'far ignored them, wanting to be in the comfort of his room.

He let out a sigh of relief when he saw the familiar door growing near. He quickened his pace until he was at his door, pulling it open then shutting it roughly behind him. He closed his eyes and let out a deep breath. Only in his room could he breathe and not feel suffocated. After a while he opened his eyes again and pushed himself away from the door. His room was dark; the only light was from the moon, covering everything in a silver sheet.

He made his way to the window, opening the great doors. A cool breeze entered the room. Ja'far pulled off his keffiyeh and closed his eyes once more, enjoying the cool air running through his white hair. The little things were what he longed for. Peace. But he was never going to get it. He wasn't allowed it. Not in his past. His present. His future. The tightness returned. Ja'far held his hand to his chest and placed it over his heart. He hated this feeling. He stepped out on to the balcony wanting more space. The wind picked up, blowing Ja'far's robes around him. The pale man didn't care and just breathed in deeply. Until a soft sound reached his ears.

His eyes snapped open and he spun around to catch the intruder. Topaz eyes watched him. The two were silent, just watching the other until Ja'far made the first move. He walked back into the room, stopping in front of his King. He bowed his head.

"Sinbad. May I ask what you are doing here? You are needed elsewhere."

Sinbad studied the other, frowning when Ja'far wouldn't meet his eyes. "I saw you leave."

"I did."

"Why?"

Ja'far turned to look outside once more. He should have known Sinbad would notice his absence. "I was tired. I have work to do tomorrow."

"That's never forced you to leave early before. Why tonight?"

Ja'far swallowed the lump in his throat. He'd been raised an assassin, to not fear anything, to rid oneself of emotions and yet here, in this situation, he didn't know what to do. He could feel his nervous build up inside him waiting to burst out.

"Ja'far…"

He heard Sinbad step closer. He squeezed his eyes shut. He could still see that woman all over him. Her and all the others. His hands clenched into fists by his sides as Sinbad's steps grew close. He didn't need all this. It was better when he knew who and what he was, but now…

"Ja'far." A warm hand touched his arm. Ja'far's eyes snapped open. He jolted away from the other like he'd been burnt. His wide eyes stared up at Sinbad. Everything from before hit him harder and at once. The tightness, lack of breath, shaking hands. All because of this man.

Ja'far stepped back wanting to get out of the room. Just wanting some time away from him. He began to turn when Sinbad's hand shot out once more.

"Ja'far!" There was urgency in his tone. "What's wrong? Have I done something?"

_What? _Rage built up inside Ja'far mixing with the confused mess inside him. He spun around, pulling his hand out of the others grip. He glared at his King.

He opened his mouth to speak but froze. No words were in his mind. What could he say? That seeing him with those people throwing themselves all over him just stirred something inside him. That seeing Sinbad accept that woman's advances- That the thought of Him taking that woman to his bed-

"…Ja'far…"

The pale man jumped when rough fingers gently brushed across his cheek, catching the stray tear. _Tears?_ Ja'far raised his own hand to his face to feel wet cheeks. He looked down at his fingers. He couldn't remember the last time he'd cried.

He jumped when he felt Sinbad's hands hold his face gently. The confusion and frustration from before was gone and instead concern replaced them.

"I haven't seen your tears since the time we met. Why are they here now Ja'far? Are they here for me?... Because of me?"

Frustrated tears built up in Ja'far's eyes. He slammed a weak fist against Sinbad's chest. Neither moved. They just stood there, Sinbad gently caressing Ja'far's face while the other slowly stretched his fist out, holding his hand over Sin's heart, feeling its steady beat under the tan skin. Ja'far was the first to speak.

"…I don't know why I'm like this. You've… made me so confused. I hate seeing you with others, seeing them all over you and you don't care. But the worst is… you don't seem to notice, seem to care, what it does to me. It's like, I'm by your side but you don't see me."

He was panting now. Unable to stop the flow of words now he'd started.

"And it hurts! And I don't know how to make it stop. I can deal with everything, any task set me but when it comes to you I…"

He trailed off, his mind finally catching up with his feelings. Ja'far stumbled back, covering his mouth with his hands. _No, No, No! This is not what he wanted!_ His eyes darted across the room, looking anywhere but the man in front of him. The control he was known for had slipped away from him and now he could see everything else fall too.

Ja'far was dragged out of his thoughts when he was pulled forward and into the strong chest of Sinbad. Warm arms wrapped around him, pulling him tighter into the embrace. Ja'far tensed under Sinbad's touch but the older man didn't let go.

Sinbad's breath ghosted over Ja'far's ear, "You really think I don't see you?" Sinbad pulled away from Ja'far and took a step back.

The moon still shone bright, hitting the pale man, making his skin glow. Sinbad reached out to run his hand through the soft white locks. The almond shaped eyes that pulled Sinbad in. The freckles that decorated his small nose. Beautiful.

Ja'far watched as Sinbad stepped closer again.

"I see you Ja'far. I've always seen you" He placed a finger under the smaller man's chin, tilting his face up towards him. "Always by my side, in my shadow, watching me. But you failed to see me watching you."

Ja'far's eyes widened and his breath caught in his throat. It was that moment Sinbad closed the gap between them. A soft tentative kiss at first, testing the waters to see if Ja'far would reject him.

Ja'far couldn't think, couldn't move. He could only feel. Sinbad's slim lips pressed gently against his, the heat radiating from his body, the strong hand cradling his cheek. His chest ached, but it was different than before. He slowly started to respond, pushing back and moving his lips slowly against the others.

Sinbad smiled when he felt Ja'far return the kiss. He stepped closer and wrapped his spare arm around the man's slim waist. He broke the kiss before quickly claiming the other's mouth once more, this time with more force.

Ja'far's eyes fluttered shut and his shaking hands grasped at Sinbad's robes. His body tingled as more contact was made. He was startled when he felt Sinbad's tongue brush across his bottom lip before returning to its home. A whimper escaped Ja'far's mouth causing a smirk to grow on Sinbad's. The tongue returned once more, this time more eager. Ja'far hesitantly opened his mouth and the wet muscle passed over his lips to meet his own.

Ja'far stumbled back onto the balcony Sinbad moving with him, his arm still holding the other close. Sinbad's tongue searched Ja'far's mouth, addicted to the taste of the small man. The hand on Ja'far's cheek moved to the back of his neck and his fingers laced into the white hair at the base.

Ja'far broke the kiss when the need for air became too strong. He let go of Sinbad's robes and moved his hands to press against his chest. Sinbad moved down the pale column of Ja'far's neck, biting and sucking at the soft skin.

"Ah! S-Sin…"

Sinbad glanced up at the small man and Ja'far saw the desire swirling in those amber eyes. He swallowed. Sinbad wanted him… He wanted _Him._ No one else. Just Him.

Sinbad watched as a slow smile grew on Ja'far's face. "Beautiful…"

The light from the moon made Ja'far's skin glow. His face was flushed and his clothes dishevelled. But his smile…

"I love you…"

Ja'far's eyes widened as he looked into Sinbad's. His mouth opened but no words would come out. He tried again before Sinbad chuckled. He kissed Ja'far once more.

"You don't need to say it, I can wait."

But he shouldn't have to. Ja'far tried once more but still nothing. He closed his eyes and took a breath. "I…I want to show you."

Ja'far's hand moved from Sinbad's chest and gently cradled the older man's cheek. He closed the gap between them in a hesitant kiss, the first he initiated that night. The hesitance was soon forgotten as Ja'far kissed Sinbad with more force. The King groaned into the kiss. Ja'far nipped at Sinbad's bottom lip, teasing the man by not letting him get another taste of what he'd become addicted to.

Sinbad growled making Ja'far chuckle. Sinbad picked the light man up and Ja'far wrapped his legs around Sinbad's waist, all the while leaving a trail of butterfly kisses down his neck. Payback for earlier. Sinbad bit back a groan and quickly carried Ja'far back inside. This was his treasure. Not for any other's eyes.

He staggered over to the large bed and gently placed Ja'far down. Ja'far pushed himself up and watched the man in front of him. He watched Sinbad tug off the jewels he wore, the heavy clothes that he was expected to wear for his guests. He reached forward, causing Sinbad to pause. Ja'far placed his hand on Sinbad's now bare chest. The man's skin felt hot under Ja'far's cool hand. He was still and just felt Sinbad's heart race under his touch. Slowly, he moved his hand over Sinbad's chest. The muscles twitched and tensed under his touch as Ja'far's hand moved lower.

Sinbad only watched as the pale man touched him; his desire never fading, only growing. Ja'far's hand stopped above the cloth that hung on Sinbad's hips. The only thing left on the King's body. He grinned up at Sinbad before finally tugging it off.

Before he could do any more Sinbad grabbed his hand and gently pushed Ja'far down onto the bed with the other.

"This is hardly fair." He said as he joined Ja'far on the bed. He slipped Ja'far's shoes off and gently parted the others legs. He glanced up a smirk on his face. "You going to help me or not?"

Ja'far pushed himself up once more a shrugged his robes off his shoulder, wanting to be closer to the man, as Sinbad quickly untied his belt. Sinbad fumbled with the other's clothes but finally threw them away so Ja'far lay bare before him.

Ja'far swallowed the lump in his throat as Sinbad's eyes studied his body. He wanted to close his legs, hide the scars that marred his skin, but Sinbad wouldn't let him. Instead he just watched Ja'far, watched as the doubt clouded the other's eyes, before smiling at him. He hooked Ja'far's leg over his shoulder and placed a gently kiss on his calf, his knee, his thigh. Slowly covering the red mark.

Ja'far gripped the sheets as Sinbad moved closer. Sinbad leant down and blew lightly on the tip of Ja'far's member before leaning back and smirking at the man. Ja'far glared up at Sinbad. He didn't want to be teased, at least, not tonight. Tonight he wanted Sinbad completely. Sinbad just chuckled and leant down and blew on the tip once more.

"Sin, stop ple-Ah!"

Ja'far gasped as Sinbad flicked his tongue across the head. He grinned and wrapped his lips around the tip making Ja'far writhe underneath him. He swirled his tongue around Ja'far's cock, slowly taking more in.

"Sin!" The moan that escaped Ja'far caused Sinbad to groan sending pleasurable vibrations through Ja'far. Sinbad bobbed his head, running his tongue along the underside of the shaft. Ja'far's pulse raced as Sin continued teasing him, showing no sign of stopping. Sweat soaked the sheet below him as Ja'far arched his back off the bed.

"Sinbad… Please…"

Ja'far bit his lip, trying to stop the whimpers that wanted to leave him. Sinbad pulled back and grinned down at Ja'far. The smaller man was gasping, his face was flushed and he looked up at Sinbad with hooded eyes. Sinbad groaned as his own erection twitched with want. He glanced around the room before spotting a small bottle of oil on the table by the bed. He leant over, quickly grabbing the small bottle and covered three fingers.

He moved back between Ja'far's legs, hooking one over his shoulder once more. He moved a hand down to the others entrance, gently pressing a finger against the tight ring. Ja'far tensed. He took a breath before nodding, telling Sinbad to continue. One finger slowly entered Ja'far. Ja'far winced as he tried to get used to the feeling of something inside him. Sinbad slowly moved his finger, waiting for Ja'far to relax around him before he added the second. Ja'far covered his face with a shaky hand as Sinbad carefully stretched him. He felt Sinbad kiss the inside of his thigh and he relaxed slightly, adjusting to the feeling. He wanted Sinbad now.

"It's enough!"

Sinbad glanced down at Ja'far "Are you sure?"

"Yes!"

Any other time and Ja'far would curse the longing in his voice but right now he didn't care. Sinbad thrust his fingers in and out before removing them completely. Ja'far whimpered at the loss but soon his breath caught in his throat once more as he felt Sinbad line up at his entrance.

Sinbad smiled softly before slowly pushing his hips forward, groaning as Ja'far's tightness gripped him inch by inch. The heat surrounding him sent waves of pleasure through him but he kept his pace, holding Ja'far's hips so the other couldn't push back.

"Please… Sin just…"

Ja'far moaned wanting more. He wanted it faster and harder; not this slow, teasing that had him writhing in pleasure.

He clenched the sweat soaked sheets as Sinbad began the low rhythm. Pulling back before thrusting forward once more, torturing Ja'far with his slow pace.

Ja'far opened his mouth to speak but all that escaped were the whimpers he tried to hold in. His senses were flooded with everything that Sinbad was. He turned away, squeezing his eyes shut and bit down on his lip.

He felt Sinbad's breath ghost over his ear but the pace never changed. "Don't hold back… I want to hear your voice."

Ja'far bit down harder, breaking the soft skin.

"Please"

"Sinbad!"

One word sent shivers down Ja'far's body as the moans he had tried to hide broke out. He wrapped his arms around Sinbad's shoulders, clinging to the man.

"Sinbad… Please… faster"

The King complied, thrusting faster into the tight heat. Ja'far groaned and his nails dug into tanned skin leaving red lines down the unmarred back. Sinbad grunted and snapped his hips forward. He moved his hand in between them, grasping Ja'far's cock and pumped it in time with each thrust.

The pale man arched his back of the bed, panting in Sinbad's ear as everything the man, his lover, did sent fire running through his veins. It was too much.

"Sin… I… I can't-"

The man pulled back and looked down at Ja'far. He closed the gap once more, his tongue danced with Ja'far's as he thrust once more. Ja'far let out a muffled cry as he came, spilling into Sinbad's hand.

Sinbad followed shortly, riding his climax out with a few final thrusts. He pulled out before collapsing onto the bed next to his… lover? He smiled softly and brushed a pale lock off Ja'far's face. Yes, his lover.

Ja'far opened tired eyes and smiled at Sinbad. He reached out with a shaky hand and laid it on the King's chest. He grinned as he felt the beating was just as fast as his.

Sinbad pulled Ja'far close and wrapped his arms around the smaller man. "You're my one."

Ja'far closed his eyes but held on tighter to his King, this man, his lover.

Ja'far smiled politely at the guests that still lingered from last night's festivities. He had wanted them gone by the early morning but a few were wasting time. He hurried down the hall, ignoring the shake in his legs and the dull pain in his lower back.

"Hey, Ja'far."

The man paused and turned back to see a grinning Sharrkan approach him followed by Masrur. Ja'far frowned at the tanned man.

"I'm needed elsewhere Sharrkan so can you hurry?"

The man grinned at him, a knowing look in his eye "It won't take long; I just missed you last night. I couldn't find you anywhere." Ja'far tensed a little. "Come to think of it, I couldn't find The King either. Maybe he found some company for the night."

Ja'far glared at the man who just smirked back at him. "What His Highness does at night is none of my concern."

Sharrkan laughed and held his hands up in mock surrender "Ok, ok, I won't push it."

Ja'far nodded and turned to leave, quickly continuing down the hall.

"By the way, next time you might want to keep it down, you were lucky that it was only me and Masrur who passed by last night."

Ja'far's face flushed red.

"Don't worry, we won't tell. It's about time if you ask me." Ja'far ignored him and kept walking trying to will his blush away.

Sharrkan chuckled and glanced up at Masrur who was watching him.

"You shouldn't tease him."

Sharrkan pouted before a grin soon found its way onto his face.

"But you like my teasing, right Masrur?" He purred the other's name.

The tall finalist just sighed and turned to head back the way they came, trying to ignore the tanned man whining his name next to him.


End file.
